Jesus is waiting in reception


W
ell hello, is that Jesus standing next to the reception desk? Welcome to three-star Hotel Gounod in Provence in the heart of Saint Remy, possibly one of the quirkiest hotels in the world. The toilets just off the lobby are labelled Joseph and Marie, and everywhere you look, there’s a religious icon looking back and the life-size statue of Virgin Mary has flashing ferry lights.


The hotel opened in 1830, is the oldest in the town of about 10,000 inhabitants, and the building dates back to the 1600s. It was here in 1864 that French composer Charles Gounod composed the opera Mireille.


There are only 34 rooms, with 10 in the oldest part of the building and the others arranged around the central courtyard and pool. Each room has a different decor, often using primary colours and bold textures.  The overall effect is a whimsical nod to French grandeur, and a glorious shrine to kitsch. My room is a decadent combo of cobalt, black and gold. The bathroom is spacious with opalescent tiles and the toiletries are L’Occitane.


The hotel’s website says: An hotel for those who look for someone different! Animals not accepted in room. Completely NON SMOKING establishment. The hotel is not adapted for families with children. Inside you find the tea room En attendant Gounod, refined and felted.

The tea room’s open kitchen where breakfast is prepared

It is chock full of artfully arranged antiques, bric a brac, religious statues and icons en masse. One energetic child’s hop, skip and misplaced jump could result in a minor catastrophe. The elegant tea room, Salon de Thé, is open to the public, Tuesday to Sunday, 7.30am-7pm.  It serves “biological herbal teas” along with local fare. A single room with breakfast starts at 110 euros, taxes not included. Free wireless internet in every room is a plus. It’s also available downstairs in reception and the dining area.

Generously proportioned breakfast at Hotel Gounod

Hotel Gounod is one stop in the 13-day Back-Roads Touring adventure through Provence and the Riviera. The company deliberately chooses small hotels with individual charm. This place takes the gâteau.

Oddities and tea on display in the Salon de Thé. Spot the little Virgin Mary

At the Place de Café next door I have dinner one night with fellow travel writer/editor Julie Mautner, a straight-talking American who has lived here for about 12 years and runs the excellent resource www.provencepost.com  She’s a walking encyclopedia (or should that be app?) for Provence and now runs her own tours for visitors.

Tour guide Jeremy, the patience of a saint

I apologise for looking fraught. I’ve left my passport and jewellery in a hotel in Aix-en-Provence (what a ditz) and the bank up the street has just munched my cash card. I can’t get it back until Tuesday, because on Monday all shops and most businesses are closed.  Tour guide Jeremy Rose tells me not to worry and Julie waves away my concern.  She gets me a glass of vin rose to soothe my nerves, and then graciously buys me dinner, because I have no money. Merci bien, Julie.

Jeremy drives all the way back to Aix to retrieve the red bag containing my valuables and goes with me to the bank first thing on Tuesday morning. With a minimum of fuss and paperwork I get my bank card back. Bless his cotton socks. Perhaps the wacky angels of Hotel Gounod are watching over me.

Hotel Gounod in Provence, Place de la Republique, 12310 Saint Remy de Provence, tel 0490920614, contact@hotel-gounod.com

More details on the tour at www.backroadstouring.com.au

3 thoughts on “Jesus is waiting in reception

  1. Toilets called Joseph and Maria?? How respectful! What esle are we going to see in this crazy world? I wonder if sex is allowed during your stay…

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    1. Haha, Georgia. Good point.Not with all those religious icons watching! Although honeymooners do stay here. I found the whole place most amusing. It’s a shrine to kitsch and so wittily arranged. Although a serious atheist would probably find it a bit claustrophobic….

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